God is doing too much...I can't write it all down!!

Our God is incredible. What more can I say? 

This month has been full of learning for me. For the longest time, I feel like I've had plenty of head knowledge of God and his Word, and yet I was so distant from truly experiencing the real thing! You can be the biggest fan of a sports star, know every little fact about him, and yet meeting the person, and even more--really getting to know him is something completely different. My time with Bible College students seems to be paying off, because this weekend, I learned the greek word "ginosko" which means to get to know someone, intimacy, the deepest level that you could know a person. This is the level of knowledge, the level of intimacy, that God seeks with us. In fact in Matthew 7, when it talks about the final judgement, the verse says:

 ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you..'

This is the word that it uses right there. Knowing God intimately. Do you really know God like that?

That's what I want!!

And I think I've wanted it for awhile. I've wanted to have a close relationship with God, but it was always so hard, reading the Bible for any length of time was almost even boring.

God is NOT boring! The Word of God is NOT boring! 

I can't really remember asking God to show me his love or to reveal to me who I am in him and what he thinks about me. James says, 

"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. "

How many times have I asked God for something without being expectant? How many times have I asked God for something, and yet in my heart, kept on doubting that he would do anything about it.

When you expectantly ask God to show up, he does.

I love how much he loves me. I love how he's finally allowed me to realize how much he loves me! I love the huger he has placed in my heart. I can't get enough of what he is teaching me through his word.

This past weekend I was in Barcelona, and I really see God starting to work on my heart. I've always cared a lot about what others think of me. I want people to see the things I do and for them to accept me and think well of me and who I am. I was reading in Galatians, and in the first chapter, Paul says,

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Wow. If I were still trying to please people I would not be a servant of Christ? That's HUGE for me. My fear of others, their opinions their thoughts, are keeping me back from sharing the love of the One who loves me more that anyone else could? That's crazy! 

Little by little, as I see my identity more and more in Christ, I hope this is changing.

God has also been challenging me as far as where my joy is. So often, my joy is in what God has given me and not in Him! I think that is why I have clung so closely to Perú. I love the relationships with the people that I know there, and I have gotten so much of my identity from who I am there, that when God wants to change my plans for me there, I am torn apart. As I learn to put my joy in Christ, the desires of my heart will aline with his, and my trust will be in him, rather than my ability to control my circumstances. He is my identity! He is my joy!

Continue to pray for the kids we teach English to at the Convent. Its a hard job as most days they want to do anything but learn English, but day by day, the relationships are being made and Christ's love is being shown. Thanks for your prayers!